Saturday, September 04, 2004

Politics Is Poopadoodle

I probably don’t have anything to say below that you have not heard somewhere before. I just have to say it here and then we’ll be through.

Not Very Regular

As a blogger, I am not very often topical, either about World News or my own piddling undramatic life. Neither am I very regular. I’m not talking about laxatives, even if in fact I should talk about it. I’m not consistent, that’s what I really mean. I don’t stick to a theme, unless myself is the theme. But myself isn’t really the theme or you’d know more about me. If I’d ever given a satisfactory answer to anything, you wouldn’t still wonder why I share so few details, despite the fact that I talk, talk, talk. Perhaps my blabber—did I write "bladder"; no, no, I said blabber—is about my view of things. Could that be it? Doesn’t seem to be—but here’s a couple of things to consider that are not unlike things I’ve said before.

A Couple Of Things

You may not even know if I hate George Bush. Christ, how could I not? I consider it fair warfare to DETEST stupid people who become world leaders!

You may not know if I wonder WHY John Kerry acts as if he’s been paid to lose. Lord, how could anyone not wonder about that? Like Bush, he’s as boring as a small-town barber. One has to take it on faith that either Kerry or the barber possesses an ounce of originality. Bush, however, has a propaganda team that makes him look like Sir Galahad instead of a barber. And that in my opinion is a real magic trick!

Liberal And Conservative

When did Liberal come to mean Libertine? When did conservative come to mean conservancy and control of the whole world? Must have been so gradual that I somehow missed it. Maybe I should just become a Republican and save money on Pepto-Bismol. They have all the smart strategists, while the Democrats have begun to have trouble convincing American voters that they can button their pants or that they’re even Americans. Everything’s upside-down. The man who foolishly bragged of serving his country is portrayed as “actually” a coward and traitor, and the man who stayed home during the war, polished his shoes, and drank good whiskey is portrayed as a noble hero. An "actual" hero? And neither can yet convince a definite majority of the country that they’re very different from one another. I doubt they will.

Dysfunctional Politics Make Me Spit

Both sides are dysfunctional. Traditionally, what part of the public funds isn’t stolen by Republicans (this time around by redirecting it to Halliburton and other corporate coffers) will instead be pissed away by the Democrats’ incompetence. The reason we can’t decide which is worse is because they’re both so utterly fucked up. I’m sorry; I’m in no mood to be polite about it.

What does all this have to do with my blog? I dunno. I am a perpetual complainer and faultfinder. I don’t like anybody, and I dislike politicians and their parties of self-conceit even more. While there’s so little difference between them and while neither has done anything for decades that wasn’t “politically motivated” or a “political stunt”, what should we think of them? Do you suppose we should think well of them? I don’t want to ever again hear either party accuse the other of “playing politics” about something. That’s the game both sides play. Both would play politics with their grandmother’s funeral. How can anyone believe one to be better than the other, I wonder? They make me want to spit—or worse.

Democrats and Republicans continue to be completely self-serving while whistling patriotic tunes and telling the public that there’s no such thing as “pork” in the political system. Or, if there is pork, it’s the other guy’s pork, MY CANDIDATE certainly wouldn’t insist on costly new unneeded facilities in his district while money was desperately needed to feed children, fight terrorists, maintain health care, or keep both public and higher educational systems afloat.

Tweedledee And Tweedledum, Never Unemployed

If Candidate A wins, he’ll be advised by one set of self-serving corporations. If Candidate B wins, his administration will be advised by another set of corporations just as un-virtuous and unconcerned about health care or the cost of prescription medicine. Both will pay holy-moly lip service to “capitalism” and descry nearly all efforts to lend support to “the people” out of consideration for the rich. Cheap prescriptions in America will starve the drug companies and the world will end. The rich say that the world will crumble without their creative output and their greedy intake. The rich must have their outrageous share—more than mere blue-collar workers, more than all others put together.

Whom shall we choose to lead us during war, this current war with Iraq that Bush so favors that he’ll stretch any truth to the breaking point to sell it, the same war Kerry apparently plans to continue with a more solemn than solemn patriotic expression. Kerry will end up as another Nixon, who got elected bamming the drum and slamming the desk drawers about “an honorable peace” in Viet Nam, then took forever to get the hell out of there with our honorable helicopters being shoved off the decks of air carriers at the rate of millions of dollars per minute.

Rob Me, I Don't Mind

Yes sir, it’s the same old crap and claptrap. They’re all Robber Barons in modern dress. My guy is straight and honest and true; your guy is a crooked, vulgar, venomous snake. Your guy would eat live babies or dead rats for a handful of votes! My guy could eat even more babies and rats, so there!

Oops, I didn’t mean to speak that frankly… This is why I stay away from politics—I end up wanting to kill everyone. Still, I’m not certain what’s so wrong about killing robber barons.

Goddamn The Party Line

You know, I really wish that everyone wasn’t so loyal to their own side. I’d like to see someone other than John McCain vote his conscience instead of the Party line. What was that old song about “goddamn the Pusher Man”? I say, “goddamn the Party line!” Maybe it’s true that some of us have so little influence that we can’t be blamed for the badness of the world, but is it true that none of us can be blamed? If so, let’s at least save some big money; instead of a lengthy campaign, let the candidates meet on live TV for five minutes and shoot dice for it. One throw. Winner take all, even if the public loses. Same process, just quicker and cheaper.

The public never really wins, anyway.

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Abandon hope, all ye who enter here! (At least put on your socks and pants.)