Friday, April 15, 2005

Men Into Monsters

Can't Argue With That

"You just can't imagine," Sallye told him, "how many men I meet who seem so interesting at first, and then turn into monsters."

"Really?" Tanner said. He wasn't surprised at what she'd said, just pausing in an attempt to consider what effect this revelation might have on his chances with her.

"Some 'turn' on the first date, and that's convenient, of course. It saves me time and a whole lot more! But many don't turn at all until after I've invested a lot of time in them. Maybe on the third or fourth date, or after I've slept with them, or even after I've let them move in with me, the bastards suddenly show themselves. It's very depressing when the men you love turn into monsters."

"It's depressing when women do it, too, you know," he said, raising his eyebrows.

"I suppose so. But you asked me why I'm so prudent, so slow and unwilling to let you get close to me, and that's your answer. If you've heard it before or said it yourself of women, then it ought to simply make that much more sense to you. It ought to make it unarguable."

"You're right to an extent, but let's keep that word 'unarguable' out of it, please. Life's tough enough, thank you, without being unable to talk it over."

"I guess you're right," she smiled.

It was the second large, genuine smile of hers he'd seen, and it helped him remember why he thought she might be worth some trouble to get to know. He hadn't exactly fallen in love with Sallye but he had fallen deeply in lust or in fascination with her. He was interested, even though she might turn out to be a monster. Even though, as he well knew, he might.

He remembered what his friend Phil had said recently about women: "I notice now that we're past 40, all the good ones are unavailable—either already married, or else barely have any interest in sex at all. Some of them have become like vampires—which may only be to say like men—and only make an effort to go out when they're hungry."

Tanner found that he couldn't argue with that.


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