Wednesday, April 07, 2004

In Desperate Need Of Blog Subjects For Tomorrow And Tomorrow And Tomorrow

I go along and things are fine, more or less. Maybe I’m just a thoughtless slug, but that’s okay. Things are fine, I say. Then, with some trepidation, I put my photo on my blog. Maybe people need every sense of connection they can get, I’m thinking. Nothing bad happens. Nobody makes fun. (Well, they could!) I’m safe.

Then my oldest and dearest friend in the world writes and advises me that the photo is beautiful, but that I should get new glasses, that I’m going to scare somebody in these old ones!


Now listen, I simply cannot tell you what respect and love I have for this middle-aged woman that I’ve known for more than 35 years. There may be better people in the world, but I don’t know them. She’s smart and she’s sweet and she’s a hard worker and she’s got a Ph. D. and she played good chess back when I played well enough to Know when someone played well. I’m certain, too, that there’s nobody more trustworthy. I’d tell her my secrets if I could find a good one. I’d let her hold my money for me, if I had any. If she had the last remaining photo of me with that overly affectionate goat, I believe that she could keep it private until I could get there and burn it and eat the ashes.

So how does it happen that this pearl of a friend jumps up and tells me that my big glasses are going to make me scare little children in the street?! Great Scott, doesn’t she think I have Real Things to worry about? Besides, this is a woman so thrifty about such things herself that she buys her reading glasses off the rack at the local grocery or drug store. Surely, she doesn’t imagine that I’d be unthrifty enough to get new glasses before their time?

I guess I might as well laugh. Otherwise, I’d try to make sense of it and that would keep me up all night. It’s hard on my eyes these days if I stay up late and I don’t want to make a bad thing worse. The sooner my eyes worsen, the sooner I’ll have to buy new glasses, and then I’ll have to deal with looking like a scary bear if I choose the wrong glasses.

You know, the funny part is that I was never too conscious of having my glasses on in that photo. I am, now, of course. Friends--what would we do without them to poke us, insult us, and tell us to sit up straight? I always thought that’s what we had mothers for. So, okay, I still love my friend, don’t worry, I think she’s a peach, the nicest girl on the block when she isn’t giving me a crack on the head. She even gave me this blog topic for today, just when I was running low on ideas. So remember, everyone, if you want to assault or insult or just drub your oldest friends a little, go ahead. They may be in desperate need of blog subjects, too.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Writers should be read, but neither seen nor heard. -- Daphne du Maurier

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Abandon hope, all ye who enter here! (At least put on your socks and pants.)