Friday, December 15, 2006

Hot Nurse!

I got up early this morning and showered and put some air in my slow-leaking front tire and went to the doctor's office. I was only there for them to take my blood again and I thought that'd be quick. Well, I had to wait a while, anyway. I wasn't in any hurry, but I hadn't brought anything with me to read, and that was a drawback. I stared at the four walls and at a few patients and office workers; eventually I was called by a very handsome woman. I began to wonder how old she was; she wasn't young and she was very attractive, but I still couldn't tell if she was 50 or 60. Either way, I didn't mind. She was very serious, but not unfriendly. I didn't flirt with her much; I don't like to make ladies nervous when they're sticking me with needles. When she got through taking blood, she told me they just needed a urine specimen and I'd be through.

"Oops!" I said.

I didn't even notice if the handsome nurse grinned. I never can tell when I can or can't pee these days until the moment arrives. The nurse had taken several vials of blood, I was wishing that could suffice! I took the cup and went to see. I was there "seeing" for a long time, but no peeing ensued. By the time I returned to tell the pretty lady that I'd come back later in the day since I live close to the doctor's clinic, I'd pretty well disassociated my crummy uncooperative penis from any connection to sex or the handsome nurse. I'd like to report that I went back later and got finished with my business there (of any kind), but even that's not the case.

I ran the leaf blower and raked leaves and burned leaves and generally distracted myself, and got very tired. It got to be nearly 4 p.m. and I drove down the road headed back to the clinic, but Oops again! The evening traffic was VERY bad, and the goddamn sun was in my eyes and I was too blinded to see the oncoming traffic. I had to turn around and go back home. Shitfire! I feel like I pissed the whole day away (ha) failing to piss (or anything else)!


3 comments:

  1. Guys have it made when it comes to giving urine specimens. You have all your equipment right out in front of you. I have to keep peeing, then stopping to see if it's actually going into the container. Then I have to eyeball the amount. I usually spend a good three or four minutes trying to decide if I have enough. Either way, I usually end up with more pee on my fingers than in my cup.

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  2. I can handle my pee. It's my not-pee that I can't handle!

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  3. What I want to know is, have you fixed that damned tire yet?

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