Saturday, March 21, 2009

Leaning To The Left In The Lurch

Energizer Bunny Slippers

I wonder how we ever get the notion that anyone is reading all this tripe? I know in the beginning it's usually not true, but we persevere or malinger or somehow hang on. For a while, whether we're admired and befriended by strangers or not, we come to believe that some one is there--they agree and disagree, they reflect us, they pollute, they may seem no worse than us most times, but that's a left-handed compliment... I'm left-handed, so I ought to know about those. I've left some in the lurch and I've been left nothing in the will. How would it work, I wonder, if everyone I ever communicated with via blogs or because of blogs came back all at once from the Dead (wherever they went)? Try to imagine yourself at a party where everyone there already knows all the worst shit about you! You could relax, I guess, since you'd neither be able to offend anyone very greatly nor have a chance in the world of getting laid! Oh Lord, let's grunt, groan, and go home naked with the Energizer Bunny! (For all you out there in Europe and Australia, think Duracell Bunny!)


  1. Hum…Sex with an inanimate object, interesting concept. No begging, no foreplay, no pressure to please, no commitment, and no cost. But does it have to be a stuffed bunny?

  2. You've got it wrong, as usual. You're not supposed to have sex WITH the bunny, just take her home and let her watch you get naked and make a mess! She of course can breathe hard or do anything else she wants while she watches...

  3. Does it turn you on when you wear these? I would think the sunglasses would be distractions. Oh well, that's just my opinion...

  4. A real man doesn't wear silly pink bunny slippers! He just has sex with 'em!


Abandon hope, all ye who enter here! (At least put on your socks and pants.)