Having grossed out the inarticulate among you with Nasty Habits, I now move on to more useless entertainment (another form of masturbation) with another list, this time of purely imaginary items.
1. Blood Stains and Snail Trails
2. Clinging To The Vines And Rocks By My Teeth
3. Twisted And Gutted
4. Fulbright and Fushbucket
5. Looking For A Lost Dingus
6. Flummoxed By Fate
7. Furry in Spandex Tights
8. Lunch In The Ozone Again
9. Dirty Dang Dimple!
10. My Beautiful Burnt Beard
11. Return To Bender--My Drinking Life
12. Importunities In Abstention
13. Blood Dripping From Iridescent Beetles
14. Vacation In Vanilla
15. Steroids And Hatbands
16. Cold Meat Warming On The Radio
17. A Crooked President And Halliburton
18. Paris Hilton And Other Disasters
19. Pierced To The Gut (A Virgin In Hollywood)
20. Surly Christians Video-taped In Drag
Now all you have to do is get busy writing the stories...LOL!
ReplyDeleteWhat!? Then they wouldn't be imaginary. And they'd be Work (sez Maynard G. Crebs)!
ReplyDeleteit's a shame some of them are just imaginary - I wouldn't mind reading number 18...But only if Paris Hilton died horribly at the end, preferabl in lots of pain
ReplyDeleteSee there, Steph; you've got an idea for a novel already! Run with it! You could kill and main a series of human disasters with deviously devised scenarios. Hmm..?
ReplyDeleteOh my lord, I haven't laughed that good in a while. You are so on my Fave Blogs list.
ReplyDelete