Friday, November 12, 2004

Sex with Charley Horse And Susie Que

My Most Memorable Charley Horse

It didn't last too long (in weeks and months, I mean) but I was dating the cutest skinny girl in Texas a long while back. It was one of those things where we got along just fine until we couldn't get along at all. It was probably mostly my fault because most things of that sort have been my fault.

Sue was a West Texas hoot. She was a grinning, smirking, good-natured, good-looking hard-boned none-too-serious young woman who always wondered if she should quit "doing it" for a while. She had a notion that having sex contributed to her recurring kidney infections. Maybe they did, I didn't know. I tried to listen to her, to discuss it with her—I didn't want to be killing her with sex!—but she could never reach any firm decision whether to adapt any specific regimen of self-denial. Therefore, she just continued to do what most young women of the 70's did, she did it when she felt like it and sometimes even when she didn't. If I'd been a mind reader, maybe I could have prevented some of the latter. Maybe. We weren't "true lovers" in any sense, we didn't plan to get married. We lived in the same apartment building, yet made no move toward living together.

True Love or not aside, we did have a lot of Fun together for a while. One night while having fun, I was hovering over her like a big spider with a million dollar erection when I got a charley horse that was almost as big. NOT NOW! But the muscles conducted me. Instantly I had to roll off her onto the floor. The back of my leg had tightened up fully all at once and I was working hard to get into a half-standing position that would let me start to put pressure on it again and start to relax it.

I closed my eyes and concentrated. I was practicing forms of Yoga that I'd never studied, I was praying to Gods I'd never worshipped. I was desperate to get that charley horse relaxed while I still had that muscular erection and Sue was still naked. I had a horror that she was going to get dressed and start acting like a nurse or a mother or a sister. I didn't want her to start telling me, "I don't think we should do it now." God forbid!

"C'mon, Sue, I'll be all right in a minute!" I told her, clutching the back of my leg and massaging it.

"You sure?" she asked.

"Lookit this thing, I can't waste this!" I grimaced.

"Are you sure?" she said, starting to laugh at me.

"Any minute, any minute!" I told her, starting to laugh.

Never Say Die!

This went on for a while until, instead of babbling "Any minute," I eased her onto her back again and me onto her front again. In no time I was relaxed all over, except in that one place that was now inside of her. I wanted that orgasm, wanted it, wanted it!

"Well, come on, then, Don Juan!" she giggled, and kissed me.

I began to make a little motion to and fro. Tentative motion. I'd never studied my movements or my states of muscular relaxation so carefully before. All's well that end's well and I was doing well so far at eluding the return of that charley horse. There was no further sign of it, that night. Though I've had charley horses now and again in the years since, they usually just wake me up in the middle of the night and spin me around. I've never again had one attack me during the act of sex, but if it did, I guess I'd know what to do.

[INSTRUCTIONS: Never say die! Keep it up! Convince your lover you're not crazy!]

No comments:

Post a Comment

Abandon hope, all ye who enter here! (At least put on your socks and pants.)