Monday, July 07, 2008

Thank You, Masked Man, Once Again!

More Dull Mechanics
About How I Do Things
Or How Things Do Me

I had a thank-you note arrive a couple of days ago marked as being from a reader of MFBQ, the blog where I dispense addled advice and prerecorded messages. It wasn't the usual request for help, but a thanks from someone who'd already helped himself by reading some posts at "Most Frequent Blogger Questions". That was cool with me! I'm always glad to hear that the work has already been done for me! It's often enough that I can't offer any help at all to people whose blog is misbehaving—I can't always guess or make a good diagnosis of their perverted blogs from this distance.

I used to more often get bloggers to consider letting me have their password so that I could get in the driver's seat—like my dad, an auto mechanic mostly before computers in cars, used to do before he'd give up on guessing, but I don't do that much any more. I don't know why not—did I lose my nerve? I never harmed any blog as a result of "going inside", and sometimes I even discovered their problem. I admit that I did feel uncomfortable about having to log out of my own account before I could log into theirs—I suppose I had some notion that I might get stuck in someone account and not be able to get back home! That never happened.

I guess as time goes by I felt it was more and more probable that I'd screw the pooch in some way, crap in their blog, hammer their code into mush and not be able to restore it, get my beard caught in the gears! Some people would turn me down like I'd offered to fuck their sister. Hell, I don't blame them. I would have turned me down, too! Too much intimacy is never a good thing among strangers. We have family or sweethearts for such familiarity—we aren't comfortable rubbing bellies with people who are not in any sense a sensual, sexual, romantic, or familial associate.

But I DO love an occasional Thank You note!!! The older and more clumsy I get, the more I appreciate those blog-happy notes from total strangers, otherwise known as Newbies. I know lots of people (mostly younger) who know more than I do about Blogger, but that's okay. I never set out to know everything or even to know this much! It just evolved, and of course it's easy to know more than New Bloggers! If you're new, take heart! In no time, you'll be an old hand, then an old fart, and before long you've been committed for nonexistent crimes of the brain! Nurses will try to make you explain your bad behavior!

"Fuck, I don't know!" won't satisfy them.

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