Friday, February 24, 2006


The Hat And The Ring

I seem to take more to self-decoration of late. Because I lost all this weight, I’ve had to buy new clothes, so there’s that. I have some pretty shirts and great jeans. And there’s this cheery blue hat that I was saving for God knows what, so I dusted it off and am wearing now as I type. Call me Walter Winchell, I live in my hat. Not really, but I do more and more often forget to take it off when I go indoors. You know, once you do wear a hat, you conclude that the safest place for it IS on your head. If I take it off, somebody is liable to sit on it. Or I might leave town without it. After all, who wants to drive back across town to retrieve a goddamn stupid decoration? Not me.

And there’s my gold ring with crimson garnet I laid aside a few years ago, one that I only wore for about a year. Don’t ask me why, I don’t know why I do half the things I do or why I don’t do half the other things I don’t do! But here’s the old ring, out of the desk drawer, back in my possession. The garnet has a couple of two-bit diamonds on each side of it to accent it. And there’s a groove down the middle of the band that was once filled by what I took to be white gold, but all that beauty wore away as fast as it could dance. But it remains an attractive groove.

So, the ring is back, even if less than it originally was. It’s okay, I don’t mourn for it. It’s like other old friends, I guess, not loved less just because of the wear and tear. But there is one problem with it. It used to not fit too well, but now that I’ve lost a hundred pounds, it seems as if each of my fingers has lost about a pound each! I’ve mentioned before in this blog that the ring first fell off my ring finger, then off the finger next to that, then off the index finger! I now have it taped up (like a high school girl with her sweetie’s class ring) and wear it on my middle finger. Fuck the bunch of ya, I figure—I’m gonna keep this ring around no matter how many fingers it doesn’t fit! It’s a little loose, even as it is, so it takes a few dozen adjustments per day to keep it centered. But I’m essentially retired, inactive, and need something to do. So I’ll do that; I’ll adjust and fidget my life away. I’ll probably get good at it. Some day when I’ve stopped losing weight (one way or the other), I’ll spend the money to get the ring properly sized for the real ring finger. No more bullshit with adhesive tape! Until then: onward through the fog, all you fruitflies! Or, live long and prosper, silly rabbits!

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